Dec 19

I Have This Bad Habit Of…

This week’s finish the sentence writing prompt is “I have a bad habit of…”

I’m supposed to finish the sentence and make you all laugh. The problem is that if I answer that sentence truthfully, you’ll all run screaming from the room.

And that might just make you feel better about your nasty habit of eating your leftover toenails, so allow me…

1. I throw away perfectly good food.

Maybe it was the time I threw up 15 times in 20 minutes after eating a bad rotisserie chicken, but I can’t STAND the idea that food might be bad. So when in doubt, throw it out. People are starving in 3rd world countries and I throw out three day old deli meat. It’s bad.

2. I pick sunburn…on anyone.

There is something so satisfying about watching dead skin come off in one big sheet. If you have sunburn, watch out. I will come up, say hello, and then ask if I can peel your back off.

3. I freak out about skin rashes on my kids.

There is nothing reasonable about my reaction to a red splotch on my kid’s leg. Once Ellie had impetigo and I went apeshit. Normal people would apply antibiotics and move on. But I turned into psycho- mother, investing in liquid bandaid and disposable bath towels so none of the other kids would catch it.

4. I get overly obsessed with television shows.

I’ll admit I have a bit of an OCD streak when it comes to scandalous TV…like Scandal and Grey’s and Downton Abbey. It probably lowers my IQ, but I don’t care.

5. I speak…then think.

We don’t really need to expand on this one right? So many times I say what pops into my brain, and then regret it when the other person decides I’m no longer a reasonable human to friend. This is why me blogging is exceedingly dangerous.

6. Rules are made to be broken.

I never realized how much of a rebel I am. I was the girl who got all A’s in school, married as a virgin, watched Little House on the Prairie until I was 18. But then, underneath all that Pollyanna is a girl who will probably end up in jail sooner or later.

Yawn.

That’s enough bad habits for one night. I’ve got plenty more that involve picking skin parts, interrupting people in conversation, and forgetting that deodorant is a necessary part of getting started in the morning, but there is a REALLY good episode of Friends on right now and well…

I’m obsessed with TV shows remember?

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